Ever felt overwhelmed by negative family comments or post-holiday food indulgence? Here are some encouraging words to help you manage your holiday self-esteem this year.
Let’s talk about the holiday season, right here in the US we have just finished Thanksgiving and are moving into the Christmas season. I know for many people this is a really busy time of year. There are a lot of activities that go into this season.
There are a lot of family events, food events, and all of these different things that come together to make this sort of a crazy season. Today, I want to talk about those things that go on that impact our self-image during this time of year. I have this memory of my grandmother patting me on the hip and telling me that I should be careful what I eat on Thanksgiving because I was getting a little thick.
I am somebody who struggled with their weight from the time I hit puberty up until basically today. I’ve always had to watch it and be careful. My grandmother was 4’11” and she was a very round small woman. So you know, I got it from her, yet she was the one giving me the backhanded insult there.
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Holiday Self-Image: Holidays, Family, and Food
I know that this something happens in a lot of families. We often have people who want to remind us that we’re not looking our best or something. I don’t even know if that’s a thing, looking our best, but that was the best way I could think of to say it at that moment.
My grandmother was one of those who constantly insulted people and was critical of things that people said, did, how they looked, or what they ate. I usually just let it roll off my back because I understood her in a strange way that no one else did. But many people in my family would get very offended over the years.
This was just the way she was. Sometimes we have family members who are just that way and it’s hard to deal with because we may go into the holiday thinking that we look great, we love the outfit we chose, our hair looks good, we’re feeling good, and then something like this can tear us down and make us feel bad about ourselves.
On top of that, there is a lot of food that comes around the holidays which can be a trigger area for many of us. Maybe we tend to overeat or are prone to treating ourselves badly because we want to eat and we can’t or won’t eat it. There’s a lot of temptation around food, which again, for many of us is tied to our self-image.
Holiday Self-Esteem Tip #1: Remember Your Identity
The first thing I want to leave you with today is if you’re struggling with any of these things around the holidays and you find that family or food or events are starting to impact your self-image and how you see yourself as a creation of God, remember your identity.
You are not a creature of the earth, you are not a woman of the world. You are set apart by a loving and compassionate God who sees you for who you are on the inside and not who you are on the outside. I would love to leave you with the thought that what you look like on the outside is not a reflection of the person that Christ is creating inside of you.
Psalm 139:14 tells us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. It goes on to tell us that we are marvelous because God created us. I would love for you to hold on to that thought as well. Ephesians 2:10 says you are a masterpiece created in Christ Jesus.
It’s so easy for us to get caught up in the trappings of what we look like and our external presentation in the world and how the world views that and thinks about that and the expectations that are out there. I just want to remind you that as a woman of God, you are not beholden to those thought processes.
You are not stuck in what the world thinks about things, you are a new creation in Christ.
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Holiday Self-Esteem Tip #2: Biblical Affirmations
Along those lines, I would love to share with you the concept of creating your own affirmations. You can put them on your mirror each day and be reminded every day as you get up and get dressed of who you are in Christ, who you are becoming, and who he is making you out to be.
I used to do this with Post-it notes, so don’t think you have to get fancy. However, if you would love some really pretty affirmations, I do have a free affirmation printout called The Mindset in the Mirror Affirmations Guide. It’s a small PDF book teaching you how to make biblical affirmations to put on your mirror so you see them every day.
There are some templates and printables so you can just grab and go and do it yourself. There are some blank ones if you just want to fill it out. But my suggestion is for you to create, find three verses from the Bible that speak over who you are, how you look, and how you feel about yourselves, and put them on the mirror so that every day you see them and you are reminded that what you see in the mirror is not who you really are.
If you do decide to do this and you’re in the Facebook group, please take a picture and post it so we can see what yours looks like and how you’re using that this holiday season.
Holiday Self-Esteem Tip #3: Self-Compassion and Self-Care
The next thing I want to talk about is being compassionate with yourself during the holiday season and practicing good self-care. When I talk about being compassionate to yourself, I’m thinking about the way that we say things to ourselves and think thoughts about ourselves that we would never say to another person.
We wouldn’t say them to our friends or our family members. We just would not say these things to ourselves for the rest of this year. You are not allowed to say mean things to yourself either in your head, out loud, or in the mirror. I forbid you from doing this because we are so mean to ourselves sometimes and we shouldn’t be.
We should be kinder to ourselves as we would be to our closest friend, our mom, our sister, and our daughters. We need to remember that we are the daughter of the king and we do not deserve to hear those words about ourselves even from ourselves.
Self-care is a little bit different. I’m not talking about selfish care, I’m talking about just being mindful of making good choices during the season. Staying as healthy as you can, getting enough sleep, eating good foods, and finding a balance between those delicious treats that we find all season long.
Be mindful to make sure we’re balancing treats with vegetables, fruit, and healthy proteins. Also making sure that we’re not just wearing ourselves down to the bone physically from an exhaustion standpoint. Making sure that we’re getting enough sleep, making sure that we’re not over-committing to too many activities, and being mindful and specific about what’s worth our time and what’s not worth our time.
Also, not waiting until the last minute to do things like ordering presents, wrapping the presents, or decorating the house. Giving ourselves the time, space, and clarity to be healthy and well-managed this holiday season will help you a lot when it comes to how you feel about yourself.
I have found that being healthy and making healthy choices in my own life has such a great impact on how I view myself, my self-image, and my self-esteem, because I know that it makes me feel capable. It makes me feel like I am in control of who I am and I’m making good choices. I would just encourage you to not talk mean to yourself and take care of yourself this holiday season.
Holiday Self-Esteem Tip #4: Membership Support
Maybe you’ve heard these tips and my thoughts about holidays, family, and self-image, and you’re thinking you’re so busy and can’t think about this right now. I would love to have you in our membership, it is truly designed to help you first and foremost with how you see yourself, your self-image, and your self-esteem to help you build confidence biblically, in the way that God sees you.
In the way that he created you completely and authentically beautiful in his own perfect way. And to help you shed all those negative thoughts and toxic old habits that you have about who you are, how you’re showing up, and how you’re presenting yourself.
While there’s a ton of stuff in there about self-image and confidence, there’s also great style stuff in there. There are lessons about creating color palettes and figuring out your personal style and even information about how to build a capsule wardrobe.
It’s a gem at $7 a month. It’s a lot of information and I would love to have you in there if you’re struggling and you’re ready to find answers and ready to release that old sense of self that’s not serving you because it’s just not who you are. The women that are in there are feeling massive changes in who they are and how they see themselves. And that’s really what I want for you.
Related Virtuous Women Articles:
- 4 Tips to Unlock Your Inner Beauty
- Why I Love Being an Image Consultant
- 3 Reasons to Say No to Plastic Surgery
These 4 tips will help you manage your holiday self-esteem as you spend time with your family during this season.
Stacey is the owner and creator behind Radiantly Dressed. She is a certified image consultant and AICI member focusing on creating simplicity in wardrobes via color and style.